I was all set today to write a post about the things we will be doing this year to prepare my son for kindergarten next year. But the Lord had different plans for me today. We took our children to our former church tonight so they could participate in the singing the children do there every Wednesday. They were singing a song I had never heard of, but it was about how God is still working on us. The part that struck me the most was the part that talked about how patient God must be as we stumble and as we sin against Him.
This made me want to come home and look up "patient" in my concordance. As usual, when my children were in the wrong today, I wasn't patient with them. I raised my voice too many times. I was quick to assume things, quick to yell. I certainly wasn't being quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger (James 1:19). As I pondered my reactions and this verse and looked it up, I took the time to read the entire verse. (Am I the only one that continually finds amazing things I have missed in God's word??) Do you know what the rest of this verse says?? The verse finishes with these words...for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. How many times do I get angry and yell at my children and expect them to behave in a godly manner because I have raised my voice at them? Do I really think that makes them want to obey me and God's word? Oh, I have much to learn.
Proverbs 15:1 tells me "a gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit." Do my children need correction? Absolutely. Do I have to lose control and yell at them to bring about a righteous change in their behavior? Absolutely not. I do not want my children to look back at their childhood and remember that their mother yelled at them alot. I do not want to be a hypocrite that teaches her children that the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22&23), and yet I don't exhibit those things myself.
And so I have renewed vision today, and because of that I have renewed hope, because we all know that "where there is no vision, the people perish" (Proverbs 29:18). Interestingly, the footnote for this verse in the ESV Bible says that "where there is no prophetic vision, the people are discouraged." So I will be encouraged today that the Lord will bring me closer to his will for me by helping me to be more patient and gentle when my children need correction.
Lord, thank you for leading me to the Scriptures you know I need to see. Please help me to remember that raising my voice in anger or frustration at my children is not a way to produce the righteousness of God in them. Amen.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
A Quick Trip Down Memory Lane
I realized today that my mother's birthday is coming up soon. She would have been 62 this year. She would have aged gracefully, but she would have fought it with every age-defying serum she could buy. I am like my mom in so many ways, yet so different. I inherited her love for antiques and old houses and perennial gardens. She thought Christianity was a nice thing to do sometimes on Sundays. I truly desire to glorify Jesus with everything I do. She would love and spoil her grandchildren, but she probably would have thought I am crazy for homeschooling them.
I still cannot believe she has been gone for seven years now. If there ever was a bible verse to describe her, it would have been Proverbs 31:25~"She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come." She was a dignified woman. One thing I remember from my childhood is that she always dressed up when I had any programs at church or when she attended my sporting events or school programs. She did not leave the house without looking her best.
But by the end of her life, she couldn't laugh at the days to come. She became a totally different person when her illness struck. Little by little the dignified mother I knew began doing things that she knew were not normal, but she just couldn't fight it. As she shuffled into the emergency room that beautiful fall day because we knew something was wrong, I knew my world was about to change. And fast. She was diagnosed with a brain tumor the day before Thanksgiving in 2002. She was so relieved to know she wasn't going crazy. I fought for breath as if someone had knocked the air out of me as my dad told me the diagnosis. God had amazingly orchestrated the events in my life at that time so that I could be there every day to help my Dad take care of my mom. I wouldn't have been able to handle it if I hadn't been there every day.
The cancer was fierce and Mom was gone by May of 2003. I was only 24 when I lost my mom. She never saw her grandchildren. I can't call her when I need parenting advice. It hurt then and it hurts now to not have my mom around.
But boy...did God ever teach me a few things from this experience. Number 1-Let God lead you. I remember feeling like a crazy person when I told my husband in the summer of 2002 that I was going to quit the teaching job I had for the 2002-2003 school year before I even started! And for some reason, my husband gave me his blessing to "figure out what I wanted to do with the rest of my life." But in hindsight, this was God's way of making me available to be with my mom during her illness. Praise God for leading us through our husbands!! Number 2-I wish I could tell every rebellious, grumbling teenager to truly treasure and honor and obey their parents (Ephesians 6:1, Exodus 20:12) because you never know if these are some of the last days you will spend with them. I regret every time I had an attitude with my mother as a teenager. I regret every little thing we argued about while planning our wedding (after all, my parents did pay for the event!!).
My mom wasn't perfect. But she was my mom and I still miss her. Maybe soon I'll post the eulogy I read at her funeral that shared all the ways she was a good mom. Thanks for allowing me to reminisce.
Lord, thank you for the lessons I learned from my mom's life and death. Please allow me to not take for granted the people I love, and help me get better at expressing to them how they bless me. Amen.
I still cannot believe she has been gone for seven years now. If there ever was a bible verse to describe her, it would have been Proverbs 31:25~"She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come." She was a dignified woman. One thing I remember from my childhood is that she always dressed up when I had any programs at church or when she attended my sporting events or school programs. She did not leave the house without looking her best.
But by the end of her life, she couldn't laugh at the days to come. She became a totally different person when her illness struck. Little by little the dignified mother I knew began doing things that she knew were not normal, but she just couldn't fight it. As she shuffled into the emergency room that beautiful fall day because we knew something was wrong, I knew my world was about to change. And fast. She was diagnosed with a brain tumor the day before Thanksgiving in 2002. She was so relieved to know she wasn't going crazy. I fought for breath as if someone had knocked the air out of me as my dad told me the diagnosis. God had amazingly orchestrated the events in my life at that time so that I could be there every day to help my Dad take care of my mom. I wouldn't have been able to handle it if I hadn't been there every day.
The cancer was fierce and Mom was gone by May of 2003. I was only 24 when I lost my mom. She never saw her grandchildren. I can't call her when I need parenting advice. It hurt then and it hurts now to not have my mom around.
But boy...did God ever teach me a few things from this experience. Number 1-Let God lead you. I remember feeling like a crazy person when I told my husband in the summer of 2002 that I was going to quit the teaching job I had for the 2002-2003 school year before I even started! And for some reason, my husband gave me his blessing to "figure out what I wanted to do with the rest of my life." But in hindsight, this was God's way of making me available to be with my mom during her illness. Praise God for leading us through our husbands!! Number 2-I wish I could tell every rebellious, grumbling teenager to truly treasure and honor and obey their parents (Ephesians 6:1, Exodus 20:12) because you never know if these are some of the last days you will spend with them. I regret every time I had an attitude with my mother as a teenager. I regret every little thing we argued about while planning our wedding (after all, my parents did pay for the event!!).
My mom wasn't perfect. But she was my mom and I still miss her. Maybe soon I'll post the eulogy I read at her funeral that shared all the ways she was a good mom. Thanks for allowing me to reminisce.
Lord, thank you for the lessons I learned from my mom's life and death. Please allow me to not take for granted the people I love, and help me get better at expressing to them how they bless me. Amen.
Monday, August 16, 2010
Change of Heart
"God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything." ~ 1 John 3:20
My husband started a major renovation project almost five years ago. He, along with the help of his father, his good friend, and at times other family and friends, has redone our 1850 farmhouse and he has done such a wonderful job. I feel so at home here, surrounded by a home that he put together with lots of hard work, frugality, and prayers. These last five years have been filled with so much change, and this house has had much to do with that change.
When we started this renovation, our first son was a newborn. It was easy for my husband to go work at "the old house," as we called it. Then the days rolled by and our daughter was born. By then our son was 2, and he missed his dad so much when he was gone working at the old house. But we weren't thrilled with the idea of bringing our children along when my husband was working on the renovation. That would be hard, wouldn't it, with little ones in tow? God, in His infinite wisdom, and with a series of events, began changing our hearts so that we would desire to have our children with us at all times.
I think the first thing He threw in our path was Deuteronomy 6:6&7, which says, "And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. " After reading that verse, my husband and I realized that God truly was meaning that we were to teach our children about God and His ways at all times. There wasn't a time when we weren't supposed to be doing that, according to this verse! This became food for thought.
Then the Lord began showing us that His will for us is to homeschool (which could more appropriately be called "home discipleship"). That truly meant spending alot of time with our children. As the Lord put this on our hearts, He began changing our hearts. We went from wanting uninterrupted time to work on "the old house" to truly desiring that our children be there with us, no matter what their age. God is so good, and he replaced our impatience with our little ones as we worked with a desire to show them what we were doing and to teach them about what we were doing, and when appropriate, to let them work alongside us. I can tell my four year old son that he helped prime the stair spindles, that he helped hang drywall as he learned about using a drill, and that he helped put in the wooden floor in the kitchen. All these teaching opportunities routinely point us back to God and to some lesson He has placed in His word. One major theme that came through during the renovation of our home was that we were to keep our focus on God, and not on our renovation, which was all-consuming at times. Psalm 127:1 states that "unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain." How true, how true! We were truly laboring in vain when we took our eyes off the Lord as we renovated. It was not the most important thing in our lives-God was.
God brought us to the other side of our renovation with changed hearts. So now we are at a different point in our lives where we want our children with us when it is easy to do so, and when it is hard to have them with us. And I can say that we really enjoy it. We're not perfect-we still lose our patience with them and forget that a "gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger" (Proverbs 15:1). We seek forgiveness when we need it, and we praise the Lord that He continues to work on us each and every day. We see each moment as an opportunity to "bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." (Ephesians 6:4)
Thank you, Lord, for knowing us better than ourselves, and for helping us see what is truly important in life. Thank you for bringing us to this place where we truly love being with our children and teaching them about you. Amen.
My husband started a major renovation project almost five years ago. He, along with the help of his father, his good friend, and at times other family and friends, has redone our 1850 farmhouse and he has done such a wonderful job. I feel so at home here, surrounded by a home that he put together with lots of hard work, frugality, and prayers. These last five years have been filled with so much change, and this house has had much to do with that change.
When we started this renovation, our first son was a newborn. It was easy for my husband to go work at "the old house," as we called it. Then the days rolled by and our daughter was born. By then our son was 2, and he missed his dad so much when he was gone working at the old house. But we weren't thrilled with the idea of bringing our children along when my husband was working on the renovation. That would be hard, wouldn't it, with little ones in tow? God, in His infinite wisdom, and with a series of events, began changing our hearts so that we would desire to have our children with us at all times.
I think the first thing He threw in our path was Deuteronomy 6:6&7, which says, "And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. " After reading that verse, my husband and I realized that God truly was meaning that we were to teach our children about God and His ways at all times. There wasn't a time when we weren't supposed to be doing that, according to this verse! This became food for thought.
Then the Lord began showing us that His will for us is to homeschool (which could more appropriately be called "home discipleship"). That truly meant spending alot of time with our children. As the Lord put this on our hearts, He began changing our hearts. We went from wanting uninterrupted time to work on "the old house" to truly desiring that our children be there with us, no matter what their age. God is so good, and he replaced our impatience with our little ones as we worked with a desire to show them what we were doing and to teach them about what we were doing, and when appropriate, to let them work alongside us. I can tell my four year old son that he helped prime the stair spindles, that he helped hang drywall as he learned about using a drill, and that he helped put in the wooden floor in the kitchen. All these teaching opportunities routinely point us back to God and to some lesson He has placed in His word. One major theme that came through during the renovation of our home was that we were to keep our focus on God, and not on our renovation, which was all-consuming at times. Psalm 127:1 states that "unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain." How true, how true! We were truly laboring in vain when we took our eyes off the Lord as we renovated. It was not the most important thing in our lives-God was.
God brought us to the other side of our renovation with changed hearts. So now we are at a different point in our lives where we want our children with us when it is easy to do so, and when it is hard to have them with us. And I can say that we really enjoy it. We're not perfect-we still lose our patience with them and forget that a "gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger" (Proverbs 15:1). We seek forgiveness when we need it, and we praise the Lord that He continues to work on us each and every day. We see each moment as an opportunity to "bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." (Ephesians 6:4)
Thank you, Lord, for knowing us better than ourselves, and for helping us see what is truly important in life. Thank you for bringing us to this place where we truly love being with our children and teaching them about you. Amen.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Little Mommies, Little Marthas,
Lately my daughter has been playing a little game where she is the "mommy," and I am the "kid." Every few hours she reminds me of this by saying, "I'm still the mommy." Her game has been going on for several days now.
She also likes to play "mommies" with her friend. One of them plays the "mommy," the other one plays the "kid" (as they say), and they go around saying things like, "Can I have a snack now, Mommy?" or "Can you play with me Mommy?" Then the "Mommy" will say,"In a minute, honey, as soon as I finish this."
I have been amazed since we had children how much they like to mimic the real-life activity that goes on within and around our home. They like to play by doing the things they see us doing, which makes me think...are they seeing us doing the things God would have us to do? My children have yet to be taught the story of Mary and Martha in Luke 10, but if they were, they would definitely be able to identify me as a Martha and not as a Mary. They see me go, go, go all day, and to be fair, we are supposed to be "working at home" (according to Titus 2:5). But do they see me "sitting at Jesus' feet" to learn from Him? Do they see me learning to "love my husband and love my children" (Titus 2:4)? I recently noticed in the Titus 2 passage that loving your husband and children comes before the "working at home" part.
I have such a long way to go before I can get close to being a "Mary", and I am so often guilty of putting my daily responsibilities ahead of loving my husband and children. So my prayer today is that God would change my heart to make me want to sit at His feet to learn from Him, and that He would help me do things in the order he wrote them in His word so that I might love my family by putting them ahead of my work. This is what I want my children to see in me and imitate. And I have hope that this will come to pass, that my children will see in my life my love for our Savior and for them, because Paul wrote in Philippians 1:6," And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ."
She also likes to play "mommies" with her friend. One of them plays the "mommy," the other one plays the "kid" (as they say), and they go around saying things like, "Can I have a snack now, Mommy?" or "Can you play with me Mommy?" Then the "Mommy" will say,"In a minute, honey, as soon as I finish this."
I have been amazed since we had children how much they like to mimic the real-life activity that goes on within and around our home. They like to play by doing the things they see us doing, which makes me think...are they seeing us doing the things God would have us to do? My children have yet to be taught the story of Mary and Martha in Luke 10, but if they were, they would definitely be able to identify me as a Martha and not as a Mary. They see me go, go, go all day, and to be fair, we are supposed to be "working at home" (according to Titus 2:5). But do they see me "sitting at Jesus' feet" to learn from Him? Do they see me learning to "love my husband and love my children" (Titus 2:4)? I recently noticed in the Titus 2 passage that loving your husband and children comes before the "working at home" part.
I have such a long way to go before I can get close to being a "Mary", and I am so often guilty of putting my daily responsibilities ahead of loving my husband and children. So my prayer today is that God would change my heart to make me want to sit at His feet to learn from Him, and that He would help me do things in the order he wrote them in His word so that I might love my family by putting them ahead of my work. This is what I want my children to see in me and imitate. And I have hope that this will come to pass, that my children will see in my life my love for our Savior and for them, because Paul wrote in Philippians 1:6," And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ."
Sunday, August 1, 2010
Precious Memories
Many of my memories of being a child revolve around food. I remember the summer my dad was on strike, so we planted a garden and ate from it often. I remember the bowl we used to eat popcorn from. I remember my grandmother's mint brownies she would make when we visited her in Texas. I remember the good food and good times we had when my dad used to make a big meal each Sunday evening. My mother didn't like to cook very much, but she had a few signature dishes which we loved. My mom has been gone for seven years now, but the memories of the food she made for us will last forever with me.
One dish in particular has haunted me over the years. I knew basically what it consisted of, but I had never actually tried to recreate it from memory. I can still remember sitting at the dinner table and eating this dish. Then last week my dad's wife called and mentioned that my Dad had asked her to make something called "Hungry Jack Casserole" for him. She wasn't familiar with the recipe, so she searched online and found it. What a blessing it is to have been reacquainted with this comforting dish!
Thank you, Lord, for the memories of my mom that pop up every now and then. I appreciate them so much. Amen.
And without further ado, here is the recipe:
One dish in particular has haunted me over the years. I knew basically what it consisted of, but I had never actually tried to recreate it from memory. I can still remember sitting at the dinner table and eating this dish. Then last week my dad's wife called and mentioned that my Dad had asked her to make something called "Hungry Jack Casserole" for him. She wasn't familiar with the recipe, so she searched online and found it. What a blessing it is to have been reacquainted with this comforting dish!
Thank you, Lord, for the memories of my mom that pop up every now and then. I appreciate them so much. Amen.
And without further ado, here is the recipe:
Hungry Jack Casserole (adapted from Cooks.com)
1 1/2 lbs. hamburger
1 T. chopped onion
2 T. brown sugar
1 (16oz.) can pork and beans
3/4 c. BBQ sauce
1 can Biscuits
1 cup shredded cheddar cheese
Saute onions until tender, add hamburger, brown and drain. Put hamburger mixture in large casserole dish and add brown sugar, pork and beans, and BBQ sauce. Mix well. Pull biscuits apart and place on top of mixture. Sprinkle cheese on top of biscuits. Bake at 375 for 30 minutes, or until biscuits are done. Serves 8.
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